Family Affair was a sitcom from the 1960s. Uncle Bill Davis was an engineer for the NYC subway system (he ran the controls from the locomotive car). Despite working a menial job, Davis resided in a high-rise Manhattan apartment building, went out clad in a tuxedo on dates with vapid women, and employed a butler who called himself "Mr. French," who, despite his name, was British.

Uncle Bill was played by Judge Hardcastle. Mr. French was played by Victor French.

This extravagant lifestyle changed when Davis won three children -- teenager Cissy and her annoying younger twin siblings, Buffy and Jody -- in a high-stakes poker game. Davis alternately referred to these underage waifs as his "kids," or claimed they were the children of deceased relatives, in order to keep the revenuers off his trail.

Buffy had a demonic doll who she named both "Mrs. Beasley" and "Mrs. Beelzebub." Whenever there was a problem in the household, Buffy blamed the doll. This was actually the truth, but no one believed her. Jody, on the other hand, had no real male role model, since Uncle Bill was either out on dates, or travelling to other countries to see how their subway systems worked. So it was up to Mr. French to teach Jody how to be a man. He accomplished this by teaching Jody the art of street-fighting.

Relegated to the ash bin of history, Family Affair resurfaced in 2002 when the creatively bankrupt WB tried to revive the series, casting the scenery-chewing ham from The Rocky Horror Picture Show in the pivotal role of Mr. French. After protests from the "Victor French Appreciation Society" turned violent, the WB cancelled the series after just two episodes.