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George Clooney is an extremely handsome actor who overcame a crippling inability to stop bobbing his head to achieve superstardom.

After toiling away in wobbly-noggined obscurity on sitcoms such as The Facts of Life and E/R, as well as downright ruining his career directing the worst sci-fi movie ever made, he finally broke into stardom with his role as perpetually nodding Dr. Doug Ross on NBC's ER and as the host of the revival of Show Us Your Monkey!. He is now officially too good for television, and devotes his time to dating supermodels and beating Republicans over the head with his newly won Best Supporting Actor Oscar. Sometimes both at once.

Clooney made headlines in 1997 when he officially declared "I am not Moon Knight."

See also: The Army-McCarthy Hearings

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